Dr. Wictz: Could you give a quick rundown about The Game of Wife?
Armando Rex: The Game of Wife is a blog by my wife and I where we thematically pair a cocktail with a board game. I recount our experiences during the process of choosing the drink and playing the game. Pairing a mix drink with a game is a way to make an event out of our game nights while learning about new cocktails.
It also allows me, an overzealous gamer, to add a bit of interest and enticement for my wife to try a new game. She loves playing games but strongly dislikes learning new ones and does not seek out new titles herself. The process of finding games I think my wife will enjoy and then reading rules, watching how-to-play videos, doing solo test plays and preparing the sales pitch to her has become its own game. The Game of Wife.
Dr. Wictz: What motivated you to start The Game of Wife?
Armando Rex: Just before we started the blog we had then only been playing designer games for about six months. We were playing at least once a week but often two or three times. We were playing the same games repeatedly and I was hoping to find ways to convince Bex, my wife, to try some new ones. I had also by that point been listening to the Blue Peg Pink Peg podcast, among others, for some time and envied how the guys got to regularly play new games with their wives. So during a rare date night with Bex she happened to bring up a list of cocktails she found on Buzzfeed that sounded interesting and in a flash of brilliance she had the idea to pair cocktails with games, which by that point in time I couldn't stop talking about.
In my introductory blog post it probably sounded like the game and cocktail pairing was my idea when it was actually Bex's. I think that because right around the time we started the blog I was putting a lot of thought into finding ways to convince Bex to play more new games that I co-opted the solution when she came up with it, mistakenly thinking it was my idea in the excitement after coming up with the name. She deserves the credit for the genesis of the site.
Dr. Wictz: How did you come up with the title The Game of Wife?
Armando Rex: I came up with the blog's title the morning after Bex had the idea for game and cocktail pairings. I was concerned that maybe the title might be misconstrued as condescending or misogynistic, like I'm manipulating her or something, which was not the intent. Bex didn't think it was condescending in the slightest and so we went with it. There were no other contenders for a name as this one fit so well. Of course, it's a play on the title for The Game of Life game as well as an homage to the Blue Peg Pink Peg podcast.
Dr. Wictz: What gave you the idea to pair cocktails with board games?
Well, as anyone with young children knows, at the end of the day, when dinner is done, the dishes are washed, the kids are bathed, well-storied and in bed there is rarely opportunity or motivation to do much else, though the desire to unwind and interact remains. We both enjoyed gaming together and thought that paring games thematically with cocktails would add some excitement to game nights and would broaden our horizons with both drinks and games. It would allow us to feel like we were having a date night without paying for a babysitter.
Dr. Wictz: When you select a cocktail to pair with a game, do you base it on what first the theme of the game or what will entice your wife to play the game with you?
Armando Rex: When picking a cocktail the process usually goes like this. I pick a game. I'll then pick two or more recipes and bring them to Bex for consideration. Sometimes they are already-existing cocktails. Sometimes they're my original creations. She usually shoots down all of them. We then brainstorm and work out together the kind of drink that we think would be a good thematic pairing for the game. Part of the fun is working on this as a couple. Sometimes the pairing is based on ingredients, sometimes on the name of the drink, sometimes the color of the drink. Whatever the rationale always try to make sure that the thematic connection between the two is strong.
Dr. Wictz: So do you have something against wine?
To date, we've only used mixed drinks. While we wouldn't rule out any ingredients or types of beverages we have tried to stay away from only recommending a single wine or brand/style of beer because that just doesn't seem like fun for what we're trying to do. It's too easy. Besides, we're trying to allow folks the opportunity to recreate these recipes themselves for their gaming sessions, a process that would be made difficult if we selected a specific wine or specific beer that may not be available in those folks' region.
Part of the fun of this experiment for us novice/aspiring mixologists is to learn about new cocktails. Simply pairing some game with a 2009 Chilean Pinot Grigio would not allow us the opportunity to learn anything. That's not to say that we won't use beer or wine as part of a cocktail. In fact, our upcoming post involves a beer and bourbon cocktail and I have one planned for a wine and liqueur mix. I'd also like to add that we know next to nothing about the art of crafting cocktails so we try to keep the ingredients simple, limiting them to things we can find in our suburban grocery stores so that it's easy for folks to recreate the recipes themselves. Sometimes we'll be adventurous and use an exotic ingredient because it's fun and we're broadening our mixological know-how.
Dr. Wictz: Are you familiar with the blog Games With Two? Do you feel like you are filling part of the void left from its unplanned discontinuation?
Armando Rex: We were not previously familiar with that blog but I've started reading it. It's clear that Games for Two was a labor of love and all your readers would do well to acquaint themselves with it.
What I can say is that we find it an interesting phenomenon that so many folks, from Games for Two to The Game of Wife to countless others, are compelled to share their love and passion for gaming with their significant others. Just check out the forums for any game on Board Game Geek. Every single one will have a post asking if such-and-such game plays well with two players. It speaks to the goal of gaming as we see it - connectedness and meaningful, stimulating, shared experiences with the ones you love and are most close to. I hope that in some small way we can pass along to others that same desire the author of Games for Two had for fostering and nurturing relationships through the shared hobby of gaming.
Dr. Wictz: If you were introducing someone to The Game of Wife blog which post would you recommend?
Armando Rex: If we had to pick one post it would be our Lords of Waterdeep post. Lords of Waterdeep has become one of our favorite games, the cocktail we paired with it was delicious and we have fond memories of that night. Additionally, that is the post I've gotten the most feedback for. I had one gentleman reach out to me thanking us for the post because it convinced his reluctant girlfriend to play Lords of Waterdeep which she ended up enjoying a great deal. That's one of our goals - to help people make an event out of their game nights through thematic pairings, thereby making it easier to get new games to the table.
Dr. Wictz: If someone, say myself, was involved with their own “Game of Wife,” what would you recommend as the first game I break out to entice my wife to play a board game with me?
Bex: I would definitively say, Carcassonne. It's a gateway game, it takes less than an hour, and is easy to learn with only a few rules. I am really turned off by games that have a long rules explanation. If the rules explanation takes too long and there are way too many steps in the game I will inevitably lose interest and my mind will wander to non-gaming things. Carcassonne is simple and easy to learn. I like how you can play this game nicely/casually and carry on a conversation but you can also play mean if the mood strikes you. Since we started gaming it's probably the game we've played the most and plays very well with two. I like the base game and some of the expansions are okay too.
Dr. Wictz: Bex, what does Rex need to keep in mind when he tries to entice your to play a game with him?
Bex: When it comes to choosing a game to play there are definitely some things that turn me off in a game. I don't like confusing icons or symbols. Tournay comes to mind. I don't usually like games with too many steps or options on my turn. I don't like dark or gory artwork/illustrations. I would like Dominion more if it wasn't for the artwork. I don't like warfare. I don't like D&D-type fantasy themes. Zombies are off the table. There is zero chance of me playing a zombie game. Zero.
Now, I do like games with clearly defined goals and victory conditions like in Ticket to Ride. I like unique character abilities/perks like in Pandemic and Lords of Waterdeep. I like worker placement games but not when they involve too complicated a decision tree. For me, mechanics are more important than theme. I know I said earlier that I don't like D&D and I am aware that Waterdeep is a D&D board game. That's an exception because it's just such a good game (but I wouldn't play it if it was The Undead of Waterdeep). And I like to win but sub-optimal play on my husband's part would be condescending.
Dr. Wictz: Rex, you describe the endeavor as the “Game of Wife,” what do you define as winning and losing the “Game of Wife”?
Armando Rex: I put a lot of work finding games I think Bex will like. I like just about everything but Bex's tastes are more discerning. So for me the victory condition is finding a game we both enjoy that becomes a part of the regular rotation. The losing condition is putting in all that work (choosing, researching, reading rules, watching videos) and having her really dislike the game. It's happened a few times and it's no fun for either of us. During a rules explanation when Bex's eyes start to glaze over and I start getting polite smiles of pity I know I'm in trouble. With each miss I get a better understanding of what I think she'll enjoy.
Dr. Wictz: Bex, if there was a “Game of Husband,” what would define as your winning and losing conditions?
Bex: I really enjoy playing games but I'm not obsessed with it like my husband is. If he had his way we'd play a game every night. After a long day of work and raising kids sometimes I just want to relax on the couch and watch a little House Hunters or Project Runway or Top Chef. I love gaming but in moderation. So, I guess my victory condition would be setting up a regular game night on the weekend for the two of us with a 'substantial' game and maybe playing a lighter game during the week if there's nothing going on or it hasn't been too long a day.
Dr. Wictz: How long have you two been playing board games together?
Armando Rex: Proper board gaming is a recent love. Bex and I have been together for about 15 years. The first 14 we played lots of traditional games: Trivial Pursuit, Monopoly, Taboo, Cranium games, dominoes, Scrabble. I almost lost a good friend playing Scrabble once. We just didn't know that better games existed until a year ago. Late to the party but we've jumped in head first. I'm so obsessed that I've even designed a couple of games myself but then who hasn't. On our trip to Italy discussed in our previous post featuring the Chris Handy-designed game Cinque Terre we did play Pass the Pigs quite a bit but I don't know if that counts. I feel like we have always been gamers at heart who were just never aware. If only we had known about them sooner than last summer. But then I guess we wouldn't have The Game of Wife.
Dr. Wictz: Is there a board game designer you wish to stop by with their significant other for a double date board game night?
Bex says Klaus-Jurgen Wrede because Carcassonne is such a beloved game of ours. Ticket to Ride was our prom date but Carcassonne was the game we married, if we're using relationship analogies. Such good memories.
Because I think he's single (according to podcast interviews) I would set up Jamey Stegmaier with one of my cousins and have them over for drinks and games. I adore Eurphoria. That game has inspired me to design a series of five interconnected, dystopian-themed games, each featuring a different mechanism. I'd love to pick his brain about the development of Euphoria. From what I understand he's more of a Newcastle beer kind of guy, so we'll have to mix him up a tasty Euphoria-inspired cocktail and change that.